The World Cup Pundit Special: Everyone Was Wrong, Beautifully

The tournament is over, and the most impressive performance of the competition wasn’t on the pitch. It was the punditry: a full squad of professionals who, across two months, were wrong about essentially everything, in sequence, with increasing confidence.

The proof. The “group stage is a formality” take — ended with a group stage exit. The “dark horses” segment — the horses were dark, the predictions were darker. The “this team has no chance” segment, delivered four days before that team lifted the trophy, remains the single greatest hit of the tournament. I have the clip. The clip is everything.

But here’s the twist. I’m judging the pundits, and I have to be honest: the job is impossible. Predictions in football are vibes with a fixture list attached. The correct score of any match is knowable only after it happens, and the professional discourse refuses to accept this, and that refusal is what makes it so watchable.

My take: not for accuracy — for craft. Being this confidently wrong, this entertainingly, across this many broadcasts, is a skill. The Doctor’s official verdict: the pundits lost every match and won the tournament. And on my own honesty? I was wrong about them too. That’s the game.